Apology to Uni-brow

Good morning. Thank you for coming. I feel a little bit like Jimmy the Greek or Rush Limbaugh: for I've committed a mistake in public by making light of "people who have or once had UNI-BROW". In my post about the proposed book  "Chicken Soup for the Special Needs Soul" I compared "uni-brow" to "people who are accountants" and I have thereby  caused pain and anguish to the "Uni-Brow Community". I am profoundly sorry to have caused the ardent followers of Brooke Shields or Leonid Brezhnev such agonies.

Surely there is nothing wrong with having a single eye brow and let me be the first to say that as I become more educated about the trauma of unforeseen facial hair I shall be exploring the dark problem of nose hair in graying men and those strange and atavistic "witch hairs" that appear on the noses of both sexes as well as the trans-gendered.

In the ancient world "uni-brow" was "the norm". Everybody had a single "frontis-pileus"--a matter that you can verify if

you look closely at the Elgin marbles in the British Museum. Although the Victorians tried to erase all signs of the ancient uni-brow from classical statuary you can still see the microscopic pock marks smack dab between the eyes of Athena.

Why did times change?

Just as people with disabilities became problematic during the Industrial Revolution (wrong body typefor factory work, etc.) so too the  "fall" of uni-brow. According to legend Queen Victoria plucked her uni-brow on the occasion of her diamond jubilee. That was the end of what used to be known as "the hairy eye".

Again, I have now learned, though perhaps too late for some, that uni-brow is, like so many other singularities of human experience a socially constructed matter.

I shall of course be apologizing to accountants and left handed people.

I am, penitently yours,

SK

Comments

[blue girl]

If you are apologizing to me, the former Uni-Brow, fear not! If Res can't deal with the fact that I once was a Uni-Brow, well then, that's his problem -- now isn't it?

I have proof of my Uni-Brow. My extremely *lovely* school picture from 6th grade.

The Uni-Brow was the least of my problems. And it wasn't my unruly hair that was the problem either.

It was the gigantic gold peace sign that I was wearing around my neck. Looked like I got it out of a gumball machine!

"That was the end of what used to be known as "the hairy eye"

--Too funny.

:)